Here's a little something that I wandered across while goofing off listening to Portishead's 1994 release, Dummy. It's a parody of Charlie Daniels' hit "The Devil Went Down to Georgia", re-written by Southern Pacific agreement employees, whose contracts have been picked up by the SP's new owner, the Union Pacific Railroad.

So as not to clog the front page with this, it's in the extended entry. The Devil and Dick Davidson

The Devil went down to Georgia, to raise a little hell,
His first stop CSX, where things were going well.
He checked on Norfolk Southern, to see how they were doing
And found their managers stern, the workers taking a screwing.

Then he went to Omaha and discovered fertile ground
At Harriman he whooped ?Hurrah!? as he saw what he had found.
?I?m from Hell and seen the worst, but this place takes the cake.?
?Whoever runs this is truly cursed, this tops my burning lake.?

He made his way to Dodge Street, looking for more vice
He stumbled into Dick?s suite, and declared, ?This office will suffice.?
It was filled with fancy plaques and expensive carpeting
?There?s no disputing facts, this guy owes me everything.?

Then Dick walked in and Satan cried, ?Yer soul is mine you turd?
But Dick just smirked as he replied, ?You haven?t got the word??
?Whadaya mean?? Ol? Smokey pleaded, while scratching his horny head,
?The way your workers are being treated, they?re like the walking dead.?

?You?ve got me there.? Dick proclaimed, a sneer upon his face
?I?m the one who is to blame for the culture in this place.?
?When it comes to evil thoughts, you?re really not so great.?
?Cuz I?m the guy who calls the shots, the one they really hate.?

?You're not alert I guess, or you must have been sleeping?
?You haven?t called on CMS nor interviewed timekeeping?
?Plus we?ve plans to build a fortress, and each will have a cell?
?Where all will be oppressed, and we?re gonna call it Hell.?

Satan studied this infidel and thought about it some,
Then said, ?You can have this part of Hell, from now ?till Kingdom come.?
?But when your life is through, your soul belongs to me?
?For then the bill is due, and nothing is for free.?

Dick thought a spell before he would agree,
?I?ve lots of followers in hell, and most were just like me.?
?You got yourself a deal. But just remember this.?
?If this pact you repeal, I?ll force assign you to CMS!?

(Exit Satan, stage left.)

Source: Snakebites, November 2000.

Posted by: Country Pundit at 09:12 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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