October 08, 2004

A Dim View of Tonight

As of this writing, I haven't decided if I'm going to watch tonight's "debate" or not. Nobody's paying me to do it, and I'm not being paid by anyone to think about it, so my inclination is to dismiss it entirely. It's a "town hall", one of these worthless and time-wasting tricks designed to "include the voters" by asking weepy questions that invariably favor more Federal expenditures, more this and more that.

I would, however, vote for the candidate who responded in the following way:

'UNDECIDED' VOTER: I am poor. We have two televisions, two cars, cable, Internet, an SUV, clothe our 3 kids in Fubu & Tommy Hilfiger, and we go out every weekend to the local sports bar to watch the game and ring up a huge bar tab. We eat out every night and we have a house payment and our little darlings drive leased SUVs. What will your administration do to keep me from having to struggle to make ends meet?"

CANDIDATE: Ma'am, you're not poor. You're pathetic. Sit down and shoulder your burden like the rest of us. Might I suggest a course in cost control?

Of course, this isn't the way things are done. In the Oprah culture, the candidate is supposed to nearly tear up at the description of the voter's troubles, and ooze empathy. "I feel your pain", in other words. This sort of situation is nothing but a minefield for conservatives, because they should generally be loathe to prescribe yet another government program---new money---to ameliorate the "suffering" of the family that lives beyond its means. Of course our people will come off like jerks or Ebenezer Scrooge if they don't fall all over themselves to be some squishy compassionate type. (Compassion isn't solely restricted to opening one's wallet, you know...)

Thus, a problem. Senator Kerry, being of the party that prefers profligate public spending, can simply (and probably honestly say) that he and his will propose new programs. Advantage: Democrats.

I'll agree with Peggy Noonan---heard on the dreadful Sean Hannity radio program---that the President can probably come through this one alright, though. Assuming that the questions aren't all weak-kneed softballs that require the candidate to be something of a political lecher, Bush may be able to muddle his way through, and I hope he does.

Good luck, Mr. President. Under these circumstances, any Republican could use it.

Posted by: Country Pundit at 05:16 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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