So it's December 26, 2003.

Earlier today, I went to the local Hallmark shop in order to pick up some ornaments that had been deemed desirable but not at full price. It's regional policy of the Hallmark stores around here to cut prices on their Christmas ornaments by 50% in the day or so after 25 December, and I was going to take advantage of that.

This is what you call a cost control measure, despite the fact that Mom's winter purchases from Hallmark has to underwrite their fourth-quarter profits at some level. I have yet to figure out how to get Hallmark's board of directors to cut us in on the action in terms of dividends. I haven't looked, but they're reportedly a privately-held company, so buying stock or asking for options thereupon doesn't seem to be an option.

To get to where I'm going, here's an observation: You take your own life into your hands when you go to one of these sales and stand between women and bargains. I'm there trying to find a Bugs Bunny in a metal plane from the 1920s. These women are there to get their fourth and fifth example of Super-Duper Snowflake Barbie and so forth. These women are vicious. They take no prisoners and elbows can fly. About the only thing I can liken it to is the floor of the New York Stock Exchange. Names of ornaments are called out and occasionally they're handed back. I usually do some of this, because I've got longer arms than the average participant in this melee, and because I've got a nice pair of sharp elbows. As awful as that sounds, these things are useful when dealing with the enraged horde of Hallmark shoppers.

Anyways, after about two hours of work, we managed to procure all but three of the ornaments desired. A quick tour around the other area stores delivered that which we were looking for, and so our ornament quest for 2003 is over.

Mr. Chairman of the Board, Mr. President of the United States, you're welcome for our stimulus of the national economy. I'll be expecting my dividend check in the mail.

Posted by: Country Pundit at 11:02 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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